2019 - A Year of Self Care

I can't believe it's already mid March and that we've been back from Denver since New Years eve. Time has been flying by and the start of the new year was.. quite rough- unexpected. It was a kick in the balls really. It started out rough, but that's okay because it's temporary only if you make it temporary. I laid low from January and February because I just needed time to self reflect and I did a lot of that during my drives to and from work and especially during my runs. My friend, Marla, tends to mention self care throughout the years I've known her and it didn't really resonate with me until last month February. What the hell is self care? I thought I was doing self care by eating healthy and working out, but I was missing the mental health of self care. 

I realized that 2018 was a year of sacrifice. It started out as a year of hope- hoping to start something new in a new city.. but let's be honest - I wasn't 100% in. I sacrificed a lot of things that year. I sacrificed by relationship with Mitchell by staying back in San Diego for 3 months as he left for Denver first so I could stay committed to my work. I sacrificed my opportunity in applying internally for a position I've been holding out for, I sacrificed my family as I left my parents, and lastly I sacrificed myself while in Denver - my emotions were so suppressed with work and home. I worked through the bone from September through the end of December. I worked long hours dealing with issues that were beyond my control. Working 10-11 hours a day in the office and then logging back on when I was at home.. what was I doing to myself?! It was insane and I definitely felt defeated.

Anyway, my point is that 2019 will be a year of real self care. I'm learning how to let go and honestly take "me" time to stay mentally healthy. I'm forcing myself to delegate more at work because I shouldn't have to do everything because it's easier if I just do it. I'll take more random PTO days throughout the year instead of hoarding those hours and working within 8-9 hour days. Do more fun random things, enjoy San Diego more - new experiences and surrounding myself with the people who have supported Mitchell and I throughout 2018.

Here's to self care! Thanks Marla! :)